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The true reason Ciaran resigned from [UFP]

Posted: Wed Oct 27, 2010 3:41 pm
by Ciaran
I guess I owe you all an explanation as to why I really left UFP, after all serving 3 years and having it end on such bad terms, isn’t how I thought it would end and it’s not what I wanted.
And let it be known that I swear that all of the following is the truth.
Firstly I’ll start off by saying that, as you know I have spent 3 years in UFP, been on the forums almost every day and near every hour of every day too. I was more active when on leave status coming back days after retiring, and other similar events. I couldn’t get away from it. It was becoming my life and I had it set a higher priority than it should have been and didn’t have enough discipline to set it lower. My interest has hit ultimate lows at times but I’ve always found something to keep me interested and tried to play the odd game every now and again, even if I didn’t feel like posting a BR after it. In short I was plain addicted and couldn’t help myself to get off the forums for a few hours.
Back in mid august I was introduced to a girl by a good friend. She was my age, similar interests and in my friend’s eyes, we were meant to be. She made the intro and we hit it off from the start. From the first chat we had it was like she was the one and that we were going to live “happily ever after”, I suppose you could say.
Anyway at the end of august, a gang attacked her and she was stabbed to death. She knew that UFP was pretty much my life, after work, I did very little else but browse the forums, refresh every 2 mins, etc….one of her final wishes was for me to leave UFP and by extension – get out more.
I’ve left UFP and doing so, swore never to rejoin another clan for fear of this happening again.
I know I’m on msn every day and don’t seem to get out much but things are picking up in that department, very slowly.
I only told those I consider most trustworthy and who I felt understood me. I chose not to tell certain people because I would have thought they would not believe me. Even then I found it extremely hard to say why I left.
I miss being in UFP. I enjoyed the view from the top and I want its activity to improve, well at least in the legacy games, I couldn’t care less about STO.
The way in which I said things was probably inappropriate but PMs can be ignored, as I’ve found out and I have mentioned a couple of my ideas to certain members of UFP on how I think things could improve, from a former-insider now an observer point of view.

Let me also add that I never EVER made any threats to incite mutiny. I may not like certain people and have my own opinions about the leadership of the clan but, even if I wanted to, think about it logically, I could never make one a success. It would have been a waste of time. My intentions were all in the best interests of what I called home for 3 years, going to war on the forums and how everything’s escalated is not what I ever wanted to see happen.
That’s my explanation in full, I welcome any replies you have.

Re: The true reason Ciaran resigned from [UFP]

Posted: Wed Oct 27, 2010 3:50 pm
by Picard
I am glad to see that after the chat we had you finally decided to explain things. You have always been a valued member of this family and I know that anything you would do you would do in the interest of this fleet. It is important that when someone, a former member or someone retired feels like pointing out a problem he or she should always have the solution to the said problem otherwise nothing good will come from it.

Everything else was already discussed in private.

Re: The true reason Ciaran resigned from [UFP]

Posted: Wed Oct 27, 2010 4:09 pm
by BobO369
So where did the threats to incite mutiny come from?

Re: The true reason Ciaran resigned from [UFP]

Posted: Wed Oct 27, 2010 4:17 pm
by Costello
Although I already knew - that's more like it, a civil, informed account of what went wrong - as it were. You've given a lot to this fleet and my tough love only originates from a sense of disappointment, that you left on such poor terms.

However -- though it was your beloved's wish to leave [UFP], that in itself does not magically fix the problem of having a social network. You are welcome here, and you have friends here - myself included, despite the unconscionable devil I am sometimes. It would serve you well to know that a personal life can be balanced with membership in the fleet, in my view it only doubles the amount of people I call friends, quite a few in fact that I have met in real life.

Food for thought.

Re: The true reason Ciaran resigned from [UFP]

Posted: Wed Oct 27, 2010 9:41 pm
by EVOXSNES
We havent had that much contact over the year but im speechless... im sorry to hear about her and you have my sincerest condolences.

Re: The true reason Ciaran resigned from [UFP]

Posted: Wed Oct 27, 2010 11:19 pm
by GregColemar
Sorry to see you go. I hope things get better for you.

As always you can find me on MSN, *coughs* very rarely, but you can.

Re: The true reason Ciaran resigned from [UFP]

Posted: Thu Oct 28, 2010 4:37 am
by Shroombuck
Although you already explained the true reason before you published it here, I do wish to say that life is a multi-faceted concept. Life can refer to the on-going process of which living things are in the period between birth and death. Yet I would like to think that which makes a living thing alive is the characteristic mode of living and that is called social life. It distinguishes the living from non-living. The first step to getting the things you want out of your life is this: decide what you want. Whatever you habitually think yourself to be, that you are. You must form a greater and better habit; you must form a conception of yourself as a social person, and habitually think that you are that fellow. Do not continue to linger on the forums, but instead start living now. Stop saving the good china for that special occasion. Stop withholding your social life until that materialises. Every day you are alive is a special occasion and one that you can connect to others. Every minute - whether they are out there or not - is a gift from the gods. As the mystic philosopher of ancient China Lao Tzu once said: a journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.

Make that step, Ciaran!

Re: The true reason Ciaran resigned from [UFP]

Posted: Thu Oct 28, 2010 8:19 am
by Ciaran
Thanks guys and thanks for those kind words wienergobbler

Re: The true reason Ciaran resigned from [UFP]

Posted: Thu Oct 28, 2010 5:15 pm
by Church
Ciaran, I've always respected you, and I consider you a good friend. I'm so sorry for what happened, and I wish you the best in your future. If you ever decide to come back, you have friends here, and we'd be glad to see you return. Take care, friend.

Re: The true reason Ciaran resigned from [UFP]

Posted: Sat Oct 30, 2010 4:44 pm
by McManus
Hmm, well that was an interesting read, sorry to hear about that Ciaran.